Wedding Counseling: Talking With The Chaplain
What should you talk with the chaplain about during the wedding counseling? What do you want to be sure to let him know in order to ensure the wedding goes as you want it to go?
You'll need to meet with the chaplain who will be administering the service prior to the wedding at some point to discuss the details that you want him to know and that he wants you to know. You'll want to find out your church's rules and regulations pertaining to your situation. If you are having an interfaith marriage, you'll want to find out what your particular church has to say about that. If you want a particular event to take place during your wedding, you'll want to be sure to ask the chaplain whether that would be acceptable. The bottom line is that there are a number of things you need to know about your particular religion's wedding services before you get too involved in planning the wedding. You don't want to get in a situation where you've already decided that you'll have the ceremony done this way in your church, when your church won't allow that particular event. Here is a list of other things you'll want to find out from the chaplain before you get married.
- Who will conduct the wedding ceremony and officiate the service? You want to be sure to ask this question. You don't want to get caught in a situation, assuming that one minister that you particularly like will automatically conduct the service, only to find out that he/she is unavailable that day.
- Will the church provide the organist? Ask what musical services may be available to you. If you don't know someone who can play the organ, you'll want to find out if the regular church organist is available for free or at a price. Also find out if you can bring in your own music talent if you so choose.
- Are there any counseling requirements before you get married? Some religions require the new bride and groom go through a series of counseling. You want to make sure you know thorough details about this process before you get too far involved. The last thing you want is to arrive at the week of the wedding only to find out you haven't met your religion's requirements.
- Are the dates for your wedding available for the church?
- How much does it cost to use the church?
- What kinds of music are you allowed to have? Make sure that the music you'll want to be performed is actually permitted to be played in that church.
- Can you get into the church early for decorating purposes? How early?