You Are At: AllSands Home > Kids > Parent Control
Many people have joked with me about being my parents’ “science project.” My father is a doctor, and psychologist, while my mother is a lawyer, and also a psychologist. I’ve always been held up as the example of the perfect child: perfect manners, smart, cordial, agreeable, etc. But… to tell you the truth, it isn’t that I’m any better than the average kid, it’s that I picked up special tricks to control my parents’ behavior!

Let’s start with the basics: Never engage in a screaming match, no matter how right you are. The goal of any fight is to make the other person (specifically your parent) feel dumb. Talk very calmly, collected, and righteously. Don’t break a sweat, and don’t show that the conflict is affecting you in any way. Wait for your parent to finish their rampage of obscenities and loud words, then calmly reason your way to victory.

Well, what if you truthfully did something wrong, and you can’t justify it? Don’t despair. Guilt is a very useful trick! Turn the situation around, bring something up in the past that will make your parent feel very guilty. Find a very tiny thing wrong in the situation, that is their fault, and harp on it, don’t let it drop. Cry if necessary, but not because YOU did something wrong, but because they hurt your feelings and emotionally damaged you.

Teenagers always complain that their curfew is too early. How do you fix this? Be reliable, this gives you ammunition for later. Always come home one or two minutes before your curfew. If you will be even one minute late, call… and let them know this. Then after a few weeks, tell them how reliable you’ve been, and explain that you believe that you need to be reinforced for good behavior. Tell them that you feel you deserve to be able to stay out an extra hour. Then the first few times, come home at your old curfew, and slowly work up to the next time. Keep doing this till you don’t have a curfew. I got rid of my curfew at the age of fifteen.

How do you get them to let you go wherever you want with your date? Make them feel as if your date is their choice. Introduce them to your date, then later complain about stupid things you shouldn’t be complaining about. For example, if your date is gorgeous, say to your parents that he/she isn’t cute enough. Your parents will then jump to the kid’s defense, and feel as if they are on his/her side. This will lead to them being comfortable and they will start to trust your date.

Psychology is a very useful science. Make sure to study it in school, it lets you control your surroundings. I hope these tricks are useful, and remember, try to act mature, it will let you get your way.